The grout song

[TJ Smiler]

Great stuff old son.

Love ya mate

TJ

 

[Dave Ramsden]

OMG - You guys AND those guys are all tapped! :lol:

 

[chris.tiling]

I have just read this and the US thread and seen Wivers amazing version - what a talent - obviously wasted in tiling (or were you wasted???)
:hurray::lol::hurray::lol:

 

[wivers]

I'm always wasted mate...its the only way i can think straight lol

 

[TJ Smiler]

You never think straight wivs...... you big gay bear!!!


TJ

 

[Eddie]

Wivs, I just tried to read your song to the wife. I couldn't read it for laughing. I really had tears running down my face. You really are wasted tiling. Real class bud.:hurray::hurray::hurray:
Cheers, Edd

 

[DHTiling]

Right.. we have a few funny guys/gals on here now..

Can anyone better wivers attempt..?

 

[Ian]

Gimme a couple of days, I'll rustle something up! Need to choose a tune first, infact, if everyone posts songs that they might like to hear a parody of in a bank hol tunes thread, I'll see if I can do something with one of those!!!!

 

[DHTiling]

Look forward to it.. the Challenge is on..🙂

 

[Stewart]

I'm not worthy of attempting to top that...... Wivers is a legend and I know my limits.

 

[enduro]

No chance...That's better than Queen's version!!

 

[Ian]

I've just been looking through the lyrics of a few tunes, not an easy task!

 

[Stewart]

I've just been looking through the lyrics of a few tunes, not an easy task!

Come on Bri... You can do it.

 

[user123]

Wow, just seen wiver's version, :lol: what a clever cookie he is!!!

 

[Ian]

Ok, just a quick one. I'll do a better one when I've had a good think about which song to use. This is Dolly Parton's 9 to 5

Tumble outta bed and stumble to the kitchen
Lippin’ on the tiles has got me trippin’
Shouldn’t have done that tiling pi$$ed last nite

Jump into the shower the tiles start fallin’
This was meant for the missus my timings appalling
They shouldn’t let me tile 9 to 5

Chorus

Tiling 9 to 5 , I’ve no idea what I’m doing
Earning bugger all, all my customer are suing
I go to Topps tiles and they never give me credit
If they give advice, I know I can forget it

9 to 5, if you give all your money
I’ll do a job, that your mates will think is funny
Leave me in your house, your possessions I’ll be stealin’
If you give me stone, I’ll use urine for the sealin’

Get to the van, the keys not workin’
Piece of s**t is gonna need burnin’
Not sure why I bought it anyway

Bought it off a pikey couldn’t understand him
200 quid and a dog is what I gave him
Robbed me blind is all I have to say

Chorus

Tiling 9 to 5, I’ve no idea what I’m doing
Earning bugger all, all my customers are suing
I go to Topps tiles and they never give me credit
If they give advice, I know I can forget it

 

[DHTiling]

:lol:

Spot on


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[enduro]

YESTERDAY

Yesterday all my tile suppliers seemed so far away
Now it looks like i will have to travel so far each day
Oh i believe in Mapei

Suddenly i only have half a bag of addy next to me
Now there is a Tile Giant close to me
Oh yesterday Mapei came suddenly

Why she had to go to Topps tiles
I dont know she wouldnt say
I told her Tile giant
Now i long for Mapei

Yesterday tiling was such an easy game to play
Got some Keraflex next to me
Oh i believe in Mapei

Why she went to B&Q i dont know she wouldnt say
Crap tiles cheap to buy
Oh i long for Mapei

Yesterday tiling finished by midday
Now i need a cheque because it is pay day
Oh i believe in Mapei

 

[DHTiling]

That is faf Andrew :lol:

You just upped the Game


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[user123]

Brilliant, :lol: both of you, Bri and Andrew!

 

[Stewart]

Well done guys, but you obviously have far too much time on your hands.... I'm struggling to have time to answer short posts.....

 

[Ian]

I have chosen a new song!!!! I heard it on the golden hour on radio 1 this morning, watch this space.

 

[user123]

Well done guys, but you obviously have far too much time on your hands.... I'm struggling to have time to answer short posts.....

Nah, they're just really quick and sharp ...

 

[enduro]

I did my song as i was having breakfast this morning...I will try and do another one tonight!!!

 

[enduro]

Come guys lets keep this going.

 

[wivers]

GAME ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is exactly how the forum used to be!!! lol

Right, roll over beethoven Wivers is a cooking!! 🙂

 

[Gall.B]

Twist & Grout!!!! Think i might have just wet myself1

 

[The Legend; Phil Hobson RIP]

A tilers version of Peter Sarstedt Where do you go to my lovely, 1969 ( you young folks would have to look it up on you tube)

One verse:

"You work from monday to friday,

you somtimes work weekends and nights,

trying hard not to show

how your fingernails glow,

when you dance under discotheque lights,

but they do.........la..la..la..la.la.la

 

[wivers]

To the the Beatles Come together.

Here come old Davey he likes mixing up slowly
He got grout in eyeball he shouts holy mother
He got no hair and dodgy knee’s
Since Dan made him an admin he just do what he please.

Bri wear no toecaps he no-good at football
He got grouters finger he drinks Jack and cola
He say "I know you, you know me"
One thing that I laugh at is Dave’s manky old knees
Tile together right now, or make the tea.

Mossy pot production she got mosaic gumboots
She got mosaic sideboard she one hard nut cracker
She got feet tiled to look like cheese
Sit down in her armchair its all tiled with Mapei
Tile together right now along with me

Dans Tilers Forums he got email warning
He got wine like water he got spammers filter
He say "One and one and one is three"
Log on to my forums share your stories with me
Post together right now along with me.

 

[The Legend; Phil Hobson RIP]

I'll get me coat:yikes:

 

[user123]

Fruitcakes .. :lol: lol: thanks, wivers, I'm ehm.. flattered................(?) :lol:

 

[DHTiling]

Well Bri... have you got your new ditty yet..? 🙂