Dear wivers.

[IvegotsTILE]

Thank you Auntie Wivers
I've solved the twitching member syndrome,my 3 favourite birds are Jordan,Kylie and Rachel Stevens(there so not gay icons,I promise)
Still having trouble with my anger though,will try harder

Thanks for the support,I'll try and stay strong:cry_smile:

 

[GazTech]

Dear Auntie Wivers, being the only retailer on the forum,can be quite lonely having to defend myself all the time on behalf of the multi national corporate people I work for .My problem as an ex -tiler with 20 yrs service is this,WHY THE FURK WOULD ANYONE EVER IN A MILLION YEARS,GIVEN HALF NAY A QUARTER OF THE SENCE THEY WERE BORN WITH ,BOOK A TILER ON A TUESDAY TO TILE FOR THEM,WHEN THE TILES ORDERED WILL ONLY ARRIVE THE DAY BEFORE,WHY DO THESE POND LIVES THINK THAT SOMEONE IS PACKING THEIR TILES UP IN STEEL BOXES AND BUBBLE WRAP AND CARRYING THEM ON FOOT FROM TURKEY TO MY SHOP?????????????? sorry Auntie Wivers but I don't think even you oh great wise one can answer that .......or can you?

 

[wivers]

Dear Gaz

I can see that you have developed terrible IVEGOTS syndrome here. Have you two been swapping boddily fluids of any kind? I have warned you all many a time about the dangers of unprotected postings!!!

The reason these how you say, POND LIVES cause you so much distress is because in the face of it all they are just ignorant earthlings that choose to live their lives in one enourmous great bubble of utter stupidness. They do not have the common sense nor the brain power to realise your job is not to provide tiles on the spot from places half way around the globe. They do not care if you stress all day trying to get your deliveries in on time to satisfy the needs of so many, and they sertainly don't care if you haven't had a *** break or a can of Guiness in over an hour!!!

My advice to you my aging little beauty, is to take them all with about as much salt as you would find in an ants sperm sack. Then at the end of your long tiering day go home to "our Peg" and give her all the SAGA loving you and your overworked love loofa can spare.

Oh and dont forget to open a tin of the black stuff or two either.

Hope this helps.

Auntie wivers. :wink_smile:

 

[GazTech]

Dear Gaz

I can see that you have developed terrible IVEGOTS syndrome here. Have you two been swapping boddily fluids of any kind? I have warned you all many a time about the dangers of unprotected postings!!!

The reason these how you say, POND LIVES cause you so much distress is because in the face of it all they are just ignorant earthlings that choose to live their lives in one enourmous great bubble of utter stupidness. They do not have the common sense nor the brain power to realise your job is not to provide tiles on the spot from places half way around the globe. They do not care if you stress all day trying to get your deliveries in on time to satisfy the needs of so many, and they sertainly don't care if you haven't had a *** break or a can of Guiness in over an hour!!!

My advice to you my aging little beauty, is to take them all with about as much salt as you would find in an ants sperm sack. Then at the end of your long tiering day go home to "our Peg" and give her all the SAGA loving you and your overworked love loofa can spare.

Oh and dont forget to open a tin of the black stuff or two either.

Hope this helps.

Auntie wivers. :wink_smile:

You make such a positive difference in all our lives Auntie Wivs,God bless you

 

[laurami tiling]

yes i agree with the gaz man , where would we be without auntie to mop our temperd brows.
we love you auntie:angel_smile:

unworried of durham

 

[wivers]

Ohh my .... im blushing right down to me bloomers now. :embaressed_smile:

 

[GazTech]

Dear Auntie Wivers,I spend so much time on the forum,I think my wife has lost interest in me.Recently she has been going out with her friends from work on Friday nights,and not been getting home till the early hours.I never see the taxi,as it always drops her off at the end of the road.Thinking she might be having an affair,I decided to stay up late last Friday night ,and pushed my Harley Davidson onto the front pavement and hid behind it to see who dropped her off.It was at that point I noticed an oil leak from a couple of valves :angry_smile: Is this something I can fix or do I have to take it to the main agent? worried of Lancashire

 

[wivers]

Lmao..... cough cough....sorry.

Dear worried of lancashire, this is a very very serious problem indeed!!!!

Such emotional situations like this need to be dealt with very carefully.

I can't even begin to understand the strain your mind must be going through, all those sleepless nights worrying wether you will make it through, will you be torn apart, .......will you ever straddle that curvey body and feel her full force as you ride her to heaven and back!!!???? Of course you must be a bit anxious about what your mrs is up to as well.

My advice is to take her into a Harley Garage at once. Spend as much on getting the problem fixed as you can spare, and buy yourself a new toy to take your mind off of the whole horrible situation. With problems as serious as these you have to act fast or you risk losing her all together!

As for the problem with your wife i would recomend trying to put it to the back of your mind for a while, let it deal with itself. Its all probably totally inocent and she wll be back under your feet and bothering your quite forum filled nights in all over again very soon.
Just make sure when she leaves for the night out there's a microwave meal on the go and she's put the cat out, after all you have so much more to deal with now.

Hope this helps

Auntie wivers :wink_smile:

 

[GazTech]

All is well again,by a strange twist of fate my wifes new 'friend' turned out to be Mike the mechanic,who fell in love with my bike and then my Harley turning his tool in its direction and fixing the leak.My wife and I have rekindled our love with a new sidecar are on second honeymoon,touring around the mill towns of Lancashire,ocassionaly Mike phones my wife on her mobile or sends her a text asking how the bike is.It's amazing how people can be so caring ! all three of us are going like the clappers again thanks to you Auntie Wiv:shades_smile:

 

[wivers]

LOL!!! Glad i could help.